This next blog post is about the Chakras and Deep Fear. I hope you find it useful ...
I woke up this morning from a fearful dream and could feel deep anxiety in the pit of my belly. I thought about the Monroe Institute meditative work that I am doing at the moment – this is something called The Gateway Programme, a well established, scientifically based method for expanding consciousness and even travelling in the mind ‘outside of the body’. It involves something called Hemi-Sync – a system using sounds (through headphones) that have the effect of synchronising both sides of the brain so that the body/mind are in their optimum state for journeying to other states of consciousness.
I find whenever I am ‘growing’ or developing my spiritual life and my psyche that in order to experience blissful states of consciousness and an awareness of total oneness with the cosmos, its opposite arises too – in full contrast. I see this as part and parcel of our human condition. For me, deep fear has always been with me – sometimes very conscious, sometimes revealing itself to me in phobias (in my case claustrophobia and fear of heights), and regularly during sleep (I suffered powerful night terrors from puberty till menopause). So this morning having this feeling of dread was not unfamiliar. I wanted to understand it more deeply – and of course to feel better so I could enjoy my day.
So where do the Chakras come into this? I realised that the area of my ‘existential fear’ feeling was around the location of my Sacral Chakra. This may seem a little surprising as the chakra concerned with physical survival is the Root. However developmentally the Sacral Chakra becomes relevant for the toddler – the time in our lives when we are having to learn that there are other people in the world, that we are not totally autonomous. We are not just an extension of our mothers (or primary carer) – they can go away out of sight. But will they come back again?
The fear of abandonment – unformed with no developed cognition to understand it – is potentially totally overwhelming. I got stuck in a cupboard when I was a toddler – only for a very short time, but my parents told me I was inconsolable when they got me out.
This morning I decided to focus on the Sacral Chakra and stay connected with these horrible feelings of fear. I endured the discomfort – after all nothing really bad was happening to me whatsoeverl. I was completely safe in my bed! By staying with the feelings – not trying to do anything else at all but stay focussed, gradually over the period of about five minutes the feeling simply eased and eventually dissolved. It is only now as I write that I realise it is now time for the adult me to comfort the toddler me and reassure her that she is safe.
Existential fear of course is deeper than any wounding experiences we may have as children or adults. Our experience of being separate and alone is part of being human. Connecting with our spirituality and existence beyond our ego selves expands the possibilities of what it means to be a human being. To go further I know I need to integrate my ‘shadow’ more and more and this is where the Chakras help so much. They give us a way in to what is not yet conscious for us. They also are a vehicle through which we can ‘hold’ painful and uncomfortable feelings so that we can move through them and not be controlled by them.
I hope this may be of help to some of you today.
With my love
Here are a couple of my mixed media paintings to illustrate this blog post:
Into the Dark Into the Light